The Night Shift
by RaciJulz
Summary: 'The week before, they were trying to capture and stuff me into a suit. But now, they want to be friends with me? What the hell..' Friendship has its ways, although this one's a bit strange.
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

**1982**

"Mom, are we there yet?"

"Just wait a little more, sweetie."

Little Mikey huffed as he sat impatiently in his seat. One of his friends, Leo, invited him in his seventh birthday, in which the party was to be held at Freddy Fazbear's Pizza. Needless to say, little Mikey was excited at the thought of visiting the pizzaria. In his school, you're not a cool kid unless you have ate at the pizza place at least once in your life. It was sort of a rite of passage.

They also said that there was something that made the restaurant different from the rest, made them special. Mikey had once urged his parents to bring him to the pizzaria, but his parents were too busy at the time. Now, his mother is bringing him to the pizzeria he had so wanted to go.

They finally arrived at the parking lot of the famous kid's restaurant, and as they neared the entrance little Mikey couldn't help but bounce on his toes in excitement. When they opened the double doors Mikey couldn't help but inflate a little.

The building was huge. Various tables with party hats can be seen, signifying that it is the dining area. There was a stage on the front, covered by a red curtain. Another stage, a bit smaller than the first one, was located on the farthest corner. Instead of a red curtain, it was covered by a purple curtain with star patterns. Mikey didn't see anything special, at least to him.

"Honey, what's wrong?" His mother asked worriedly. "You seemed to be excited when you were at the car."

"This is no different than the other restaurants." Mikey said in a disappointed voice, crossing his arms.

Before his mother could reply, the birthday boy, Leo, approached them. "Mike!" Leo called, waving his hand. Mike waved back.

"Mike, you're just in time! Let's go!" Leo beamed, pointing to a group sitting on a big table at the front, most of which were his friends and classmates.

He took Mike's hand and brought him to the group, Mike's mother following the two. They sat down and began to eat their food. After a while of eating Mike spoke up. "I don't really get what makes this restaurant so different from the others. It's normal to me."

"You haven't seen the best of it." Leo replied. Right after Leo spoke up, the curtains in front of them rose, revealing three huge 'people' "That's what makes it special." Leo pointed. This caught Mikey's interest.

"Hey kids! Are you having a good time?" The tallest, and on the middle spoke up in a jolly young man's, almost fatherly-like voice. He was also holding a microphone. Mike noticed that it was the mascot of the pizzeria, Freddy Fazbear himself!

"Yeah!" The children shouted excitedly, including Mikey. "Great! It's good to hear that all of you are having fun!" Freddy replied jovially.

The shortest and the only female of the three spoke up. "Well it's good to hear that, isn't it Freddy, Bonnie?" She spoke in a high-pitched, tomboyish voice. She also seemed to carry a cupcake. "Well kids, you enjoying the food?" Another loud 'yes' was heard. "Good! I made it myself!" She replied happily.

"Oh gee, this chatter makes me even more excited!" The third one spoke up in a young man's voice. He was carrying a red guitar. "I'm ready to jam my guitar now, Chica!"

"Since you guys are so excited, why don't we sing a song!" Freddy said. Mikey and the children cheered. Freddy shouted. "Hit it, gang!" The three started to sing their silly songs.

Mikey saw what made the restaurant so different from the others. Something about the three made them and the restaurant special. By now Mikey had noticed that they weren't regular people. Their massive size, slightly noticeable jerky movements and… animal parts seemed to say otherwise. But whatever the three were didn't matter to him.

The three ended their silly songs a bit too soon, much to Mikey's dismay. He turned to Leo and was about to say something to him when he noticed that Leo and the others were staring expectantly at purple curtains at the end.

Before Mikey could inquire, the purple curtains flew open and another, umm… one of them can be seen, this one a lot taller and larger than the rest, and dressed like a pirate.

"'Ello, me 'earties!" He greeted in a guff yet cheerful, childlike and friendly voice. "Welcome t' Pirate's Cove! Ye lubbers havin' a good time?"

"Yeah!" The audience replied cheerfully.

Foxy beamed brightly. "Good! I bet ye little mateys wan' to go to an adventure!" Mikey and the audience cheered once again. The pirate started relating his fascinating adventures, and Mikey listened very intently. Mikey's mother and the adults, however, seemed to be cautious of the pirate. This one looked a lot more… intimidating than the others.

After finishing his tales of adventure, Mikey was surprised to see Foxy stepping off the stage, as well as the other three. Chica then noticed Leo's table, which had balloons tied to it, and exclaimed as she pointed. "Hey guys, there's a birthday going on!"

"A birthday? Let's go say hi!" Bonnie said. The four then approached their table.

When the four stood across the table, Mikey was in awe. They were larger and taller than he thought! And he was right, they didn't seem to be human. Mikey felt a bit scared by their size. He could hear clicks and whirs coming from the four as they moved.

"Hello kids, there's a birthday going on here, right?" Freddy asked in a fatherly voice. The kids only nodded, staring in awe. "Well who's the birthday boy?"

"I'm the birthday boy." Leo spoke up proudly. Freddy smiled and asked. "What's your name, little boy?"

"Leo." Came the reply.

"Well Leo, why don't we sing you happy birthday, bring you and your pals some free pizza and cake, and play some games, how does that sound?"

Leo and the rest cheered, Mikey found himself cheering too. The four sang happy birthday, played some games with the four and Mikey and his friends ate some delicious free pizza and cake made by Chica herself. He had a blast.

Before Mikey had to leave, he said goodbye to the four. As they were going home, his mother asked. "Did you enjoy the party at Freddy's?" Mikey nodded.

"I did, mom. And I'll definitely visit again."

_**End of Prologue**_

**A/N: Hello readers and welcome to one of your usual 'Mike befriends the animatronics' fanfic! My name's RaciJulz or Julz for short, and I don't really write a lot of fanfics. Sure I get a lot of ideas but I feel too lazy writing them. But now I'm not! :D Hopefully school and my laziness won't get in the way of writing this or make me abandon this story.**

**Anyway moving onto the prologue and this story, this is my first FNAF story but MAYBE I'll write little oneshot spinoffs based on this series. For the prologue, well, this is a REALLY crappy and unoriginal prologue. I know. And I'm pretty sure you have noticed that they aren't animal animatronics. I'll write them as humanoid androids who have animal parts. Why? BECAUSE I CAN.**

**I have my own Five Nights at Freddy's universe, but some of the elements here are based on various fanfictions I have read for the past few months. I may credit an author or a two here and there.**

**Oh, and let me get this out of the way. Ahem.**

**Disclaimer: Five Nights at Freddy's and its characters do not belong to me. They are Scott Cawthon's property. If I owned it… *smiles like a pervert* There would be a lot of changes. *wink wonk***

**See ya in the next chappie! –Julz "Long author note is long."**


	2. A Job at Freddy's

**Chapter 1: A Job at Freddy's**

**1997**

Mike nervously went up to the double glass doors of the infamous pizzeria. He was on a job hunt, as he got fired on his last job. Almost all job positions are filled in, much to his disappointment. He finally did land a position as a security guard named Freddy Fazbear's Pizza. He only rarely visited the place, it was year's ago and it was from the oldest location.

The man shook his head. No, he's here to apply for the security job. They had hired him on the first call, which was strange, but lucky. Either way, he went inside.

The place was a lot different than he remembered, since this was the 'newest' pizzeria. The pizzeria was a lot smaller and a bit messy. Mike guessed it was because of the children making a mess. The janitors might have been a bit lazy to care.

Putting the hygiene and appearance of the restaurant aside, Mike continued down into the manager's office. Along the way, he looked at the animatronic band playing. They looked fine, small stains of pizza here and there, but nothing much. They looked a bit different from what he remembered, Mike guessed they had modifications. He didn't know much, it has been a long time since he visited.

The young man approached the secretary's office first. "I'm here to apply for the security job at Freddy's." He said to the secretary.

"So you're here to apply for the job, eh?" The secretary, Sarah, asked. She lazily chewed her bubblegum as she pointed at the manager's office beside her. The door's right there."

After knocking politely and hearing a 'Come in!' Mike opened the door to the manager's office. There sat the manager, who went by the name Robert Graham, judging by the name tag on his desk. Mike felt nervous again.

"Umm… I'm here to apply for the night guard position…?" Davidson's slightly wrinkled face creases into a jolly smile. "Well come on in, lad!" He motioned Mike to enter the room. "Mike, wasn't it?"

"Yes sir." Mike said, his nervousness slowly dissipating. "Mike Schimdt, to be exact."

"Well, it's not an interview without questions." Graham drawled, happily pointing to the seat in front of him. "Sit down, son." Mike went over and sat down.

"So, first question," the manager started. "Did you have any work experience? Any work will do."

"Well, yes," Mike answered. "I work in a department store on weekends and I used to work at a restaurant as a waiter."

Davidson nodded. "Well son, I'm satisfied with the answer." He smiled. "Next question."

The manager rested his chin on his hands, suddenly going serious. "Do you or your family have a history of heart or panic attacks?" Mike was taken aback by the unusual question but he answered anyway.

"Well, no sir, as far as I know." Mike said slowly. The manager beamed, smiling once again.

"Well, it's good to know that, lad! You have the job, boy!" Mike's jaw almost fell open in shock. Almost. But he was still shocked. "W-What?" Mike stuttered.

"You must be deaf lad! I said you got the job!" The aged manager repeated happily. Mike grinned. 'That was shorter than I thought. But sweet!'

"Thank you so much, sir!" They both stood up and shook their hands. Graham sat back in his seat.

"Well, before one of our employees show you around, you have to sign this first." The manager bent down and opened one of the drawers. He shuffled through the contents before pulling out a piece of paper. Mike realized that it was a contract.

"Here, boy," Graham handed him the pen and Mike took it. "Sign the paper and you have the job." Mike immediately signed the paper. He didn't care what it said. All he needed was the job. Bills were piling up in his apartment after all. He was lucky he was hired.

"Ok, since you signed, one of the staff will show you your office. Just meet with the secretary, I'm sure you met her earlier. Have a good day, boy!" Mike nodded and went outside the office.

He approached the secretary, Sarah. "Oh, so you got the job?" Sarah said in a bored manner, however, there was a hint of smugness laced with her voice. "I guess I'll show you around. Come here, newbie." She beckoned him to follow.

They went through a hall and stopped in front of a room with two door openings.

"I won't dive into specifics," She spoke up as both entered the room. "Since there's messages recorded for you throughout the week, I'll just show you the basics."

She pointed at the two doorways. "See those? Those are emergency doors. Press the green button," She pushed the green button on the left, and Mike jumped as large metal doors slid down and shut with a loud BANG!

"That happens." She said with a smirk. "Don't you think that's a bit excessive?" Mike asked with a raised eyebrow. Sarah shrugged. "It's used for emergencies, such as a break-in. So if something happens, just use these doors."

Sarah went over to the desk as Mike looked around. It was a cramped office with a desk and a chair. An electric fan sat on the desk, poorly cooling the cramped room. Crumpled papers littered over the desk, as well as a phone. A poster was on the side, showing the three animatronics, as well as the word 'Celebrate'.

"This," Sarah's voice brought Mike out of his wandering. "Is a tablet that connects to all of the cameras throughout the restaurant. Use this to watch out for any happenings and watch the animatronics, too. You know, someone might break in…"

"Ok, I get that." Mike snapped. She smirked.

"Well, that's about it. Guess I'll leave it to you." She patted the man on the shoulder. "Good luck." Sarah said ominously as she left.

Mike shivered a bit. What did she mean by 'Good Luck'? Why did she say that so… ominously? Mike shook his head. No, she's just trying to scare him. No need to worry. This is just a simple job. Nothing much.

Who knew such a simple job was actually hell on earth?

**End of Chapter 1**

**A/N: Hello! I'm back! :D And chapter 1 is here! Sorry for the long wait. Things have been happening around my place that I shouldn't explain since you're not really interested in that. I'll try to post the next chapter as fast as I can.**

**Enjoy! –Julz "I'm freezing my ass up here. And this chapter is lame."**


	3. A Week Later

**Chapter 2: A Week After**

'Why did I have to come back to this hellhole?' Mike thought to himself as he approached the left door of the security room. He slumped at the usual seat. Of course he knew why. He needed the money. Sure the pay was measly, but no other establishment would hire him. He had to come back so that he could pay his bills.

Why did his life have to be like this?

The brooding man picked up the tablet lying on the table in front of him. He had already finished a week without being shoved in a suit by the murderous animatronics. Speaking of the animatronics…

He sighed, lowering the tablet. He had never been so wrong in his whole life. They had become hostile and murderous. _**Extremely**_ murderous. They wanted to stuff him in a Freddy Fazbear suit, which wouldn't be so bad except for the fact that, as the man on the phone had said, the suits are filled with crossbeams, wires and animatronic devices, which would blatantly kill you. Mike shivered at the thought of being shoved into one of those.

Why were they acting like this? Mike remembered in his childhood and every morning he visited here that they were very friendly animatronics, but when night fell, they become the complete opposite of friendly. Why were they doing this?

The guard sighed once again. 'There's no use musing over this. I guess I'll never know.' He shook his head and instead focused on the tablet in his hands. He flicked through the cameras and found all of the animatronics had left the stage. He checked the camera at Pirate Cove, and although closed, the curtains were slightly parted and showed no sign of the humanoid animatronic fox. This went on for nearly an hour and it confused Mike. He checked the doors and flicked on the door lights. No one there.

Were they stolen? No, it couldn't be, Mike was sure he would have heard something or saw something on the cameras. Just where were they?

Another hour passed until Mike did saw one of the animatronics, Bonnie, in front of the female restroom, staring directly at the camera. He must have moved while Mike was focusing on other rooms. What made this odd for the guard was that it was rare to see the animatronic rabbit at the location, so Mike was alarmed. However, even though he survived all 7 nights, he made a fatal mistake of watching Bonnie's path only. He failed to see another animatronic slowly approaching him from the east hall…

Mike stared intently at Bonnie as the animatronic slowly made his way towards the guard. Dining area…. West hall…. West hall corner. The security guard heard groaning and metal footsteps. 'That must be him.' Mike thought.

The guard suddenly screamed after lowering his tablet. Chica was staring at him intently, jaw-slacked, revealing her extra endoskeleton teeth. Purple pupils stared back at him as panic gripped hard at him. Before he knew it, the guard stood up, grabbed his seat and smashed it into the animatronic's face. It didn't have much effect on her as the chair broke when it collided with the animatronic's face. She narrowed her eyes at him and grinned menacingly, stepping closer at the poor guard.

Panic took a toll on him and before he knew it, he did something he vowed never to do during the night shift.

He fainted.

**End of Chapter 2**

**A/N: HAHAHA! I'm back! Quick upload, eh? Although this one's a lot short… Sorry about that. Looks like I'm going to leave ya in a cliffhanger. How much of a jerk can I get? **

**But anyway, I'm really, REALLY thankful for all of the reviews, faves and follows you people gave me. Seriously, all of those are motivators for me and what keeps me and my ass writing this story. So, really, thank you all, even if it's not many, it means SO much to me, guys.**

**Also, please excuse me for any grammatical errors since English is not my first language :)**

**Later! –Julz "Wow, people actually read this pile of shit?"**


	4. Sentience

**Chapter 3: Sentience**

"_Why did you do that to him, Chica!? You're a big idiot!"_

"_Hey, don't look at me like that, Bonnie! I was just going to give him a little scare!"_

"_A LITTLE SCARE!? HOW COULD YOU THINK THAT WAS JUST A LITTLE SCARE!?"_

"_Hey, stop shouting, dude! I didn't mean to kill him, he just… dropped dead."_

"_DROPPED DEAD!? What is THAT supposed to mean!?"_

'Aw jeez, can I sleep in peace?' Mike thought to himself. The two muffled voices kept on bickering and it made him slightly annoyed. He tried to go back to sleep but it was no use. He was wide awake.

Mike slowly opened his eyes. It was dark. He grabbed his head in dizziness and slight pain. 'Arrgh, what happened?'

He sat himself up and looked up to see two pairs of glowing eyes staring back at him. 'What the…'

"Oh look, he's awake! Turns out he isn't dead, eh, Bonnie?"

The poor guard let out a shrill scream as he started to back away. Panic and fear once again gripped him when he realized that the two were animatronics. He shook in fear.

"Umm… Chica," He heard one of them whisper. "I think you should turn on the lights." He heard loud metallic footsteps as one of the pair of glowing eyes disappeared. After a short while the lights turned on and, after one of them came back, Mike could now see the two animatronics.

They were… tall and large. **Very **tall and large. The two must have been over 7 feet! Mike felt extremely intimidated and scared as they loomed over him.

"So the little man awoke." The shorter and the female one spoke up in her tomboyish and high-pitched voice, just as Mike remembered her in her childhood. She was grinning like a maniac as she loomed over him. The other one stayed quiet, frowning.

Realization hit Mike in the face.

"W-Wait, you guys c-can t-talk… b-by your own..?" Mike stuttered, shocked and a bit creeped out. He always thought that all of they said during daytime were just programmed dialogues. That may be true, but what the female, Chica as he remembered, just said and the two muffled voices he heard earlier…

"Of course we can talk ya dope! What do you think am I doing now?" She exclaimed obnoxiously, looking offended and slightly angry. Mike was disturbed by her expressiveness, physically and verbally. He shivered slightly under Chica's sarcastic glare.

The taller male crossed his arms (How did they even do that?) and finally spoke up in a slightly angry young man's voice. He sounded exactly the same as he remembered him, minus the angry undertones.

"We're sorry for frightening you, Mike. Chica here," The humanoid chicken huffed at being addressed. "Likes to scare people whenever she can." He looked at him sympathetically.

"Pssht, whatever." Chica snorted while crossing her arms in a nonchalant manner. "It's not my fault he's a sissy." The humanoid chicken grinned when Bonnie shot a very human glare at her. Mike watched all of this with fascination. They were robots, yes, androids even, but oddly they could show very human expressions like they had done it a thousand times. Mike was impressed and at the same time disturbed. As far as he could tell, the animatronics and their technology came from the 19-freaking-70s!

The taller male, Bonnie, let out what could have been a sigh as he extended his hand out to Mike, beckoning the guard to grab his hand. Mike did so, hesitantly, and stood up. They were a lot taller than he thought. He's 6'2'' and he can't even reach Chica's shoulder!

"Look, we're really sorry for scaring you." Bonnie said apologetically. He looked at Chica expectantly. She huffed. "We're sorry for scaring you Mike." The humanoid chicken said monotonously. Mike just nodded frantically. He was still scared of them. We're not going to kill you anymore. You're human, like the staff."

Wait, 'anymore'? 'Human'? Mike pondered on the last statement. Phone guy, a name completely made by Mike, was right. Maybe the 'bots didn't really know that him and the previous guards were human, just like the day staff. They must've really thought that they were 'endoskeletons.'

But why?

Before Mike could ask, a familiar sound of a bell and cheering of children blared. The 6am bell!

"Drats! It's already 6am! Gotta go back to the stage!" Chica exclaimed as she dashed out of the room, loud and heavy footsteps echoing. The animatronic bunny turned to Mike.

"I guess we'll see you tomorrow then." He simply said. He went out of the room calmly and followed Chica.

A lot of questions were swimming around the guard's mind. And he knew that he wasn't going to find the answers soon enough.

Wait… Did he really have to go back tomorrow?

**End of Chapter 3**

**A/N: Hey, I'm back! Here, have a tiny-ass chapter.**

**Anyway, it'll be a while before I upload the next chappie. I'm going back to prison and continue on my boring prison life. But I'll do my best to continue this story, so don't worry! ****Maybe you should.**** Also, excuse me for any grammatical errors.**

**Reviews, faves and/or follows are appreciated :)**

**Tootles! –Julz "Great. Another day in prison."**


	5. Tour and a Jam Session

**Chapter 4: Tour and a Jam Session**

Mike nervously sat on his newly replaced spinning chair (One of the animatronics probably replaced it.) He looked at his watch. 12:03. Mike picked up the tablet and flicked through the cameras. Bonnie was on the move, already making way to the dining area. Freddy and Chica was also on the move. Then he noticed that Freddy and Chica wasn't approaching him, only Bonnie.

The guard shook slightly as sweat trickled on his forehead. Bonnie was already getting near the office, and after discovering their sentience (He found out that he wasn't dreaming at the time.) the humanoid animatronics won't be too happy to find the doors shut down on them.

Bonnie was already at the west hall corner beside the door. It took all of the guard's restraint not to shut down the door and scream out in fear.

Bonnie knocked on wall, metallic sound coming from the animatronic's pounding. "Can I come in?" The animatronic asked politely. Mike nodded, a bit less nervous than before, but the fear didn't leave him. After all, he didn't know what the animatronic was planning for him.

The lavender animatronic went in, couching down a bit as he passed the doorway. Bonnie looked at the guard with a forlorn look (How did they even do that?)

"Sop shivering Mike, I'm not going to hurt you."

Mike gulped, openly showing his fear. Bonnie let out a sigh, or a sound that was at least close to a sigh. "You don't need to fear us. Sorry about yesterday. Chica just doesn't know how to stop being a jerk. But we promise you, we're not going to hurt you in any way."

'Not going to hurt you in any way? You can tell that to me when you tried to stuff me in a suit!' Mike thought angrily. However, he didn't voice these thoughts, since he didn't want to upset a large robo-human rabbit. Instead, he just nodded and stood up.

"Good!" Bonnie said approvingly.

"S-so," Mike started. "What are you doing here?" That sounded a bit rude but he had to know.

"Well, we want to be friends with you." Bonnie simply said.

'What!?' Mike thought, shocked. Friends with him!?

"S-so you DON'T want to stuff me in a suit?" Mike asked. Bonnie had questioning look on his face. "Well, you're human, a guard, not an endoskeleton." His voice became sheepish. "We just found that out last night."

'So that's why they were gone from the cameras for a while.' Mike thought. Then a question popped in his mind.

"W-What about the other's?" "Others? What others?" Bonnie said questioningly. "You're the first human guard we have seen."

Mike's blood ran cold. 'They didn't know. They were, are clueless.' Despite the realization, he decided to drop the subject and ask about it later. Much later. The humanoid rabbit already looked peeved.

"So, Mike, how about I give you a tour of the restaurant?" Mike raised his eyebrows questioningly. "Um, Bonnie, why would I need that? I already saw all of the rooms in this restaurant through the cameras." Mike said matter-of-factly.

"That may be true, but it's nothing compared to seeing it personally." The bunny animatronic replied. Hmmm. He had a point. "O-Okay." The guard stood up and followed the lavender-clothed rabbit.

The two went out through the west hall. They passed by the Supply Closet, the place where Bonnie usually hides. When they passed by Pirate Cove, Mike couldn't help but stare at the purple curtains. The animatronic noticed this and couldn't help but chuckle.

"You know," Bonnie started as Mike averted his eyes away from the cove. "Foxy is sleeping in there, taking a rest." The guard stared up at Bonnie in bewilderment. "Figuratively." Mike could only let out an 'oh'.

He decided to ask. "Is Foxy… nice?" It was a weird question, but he was curious.

The animatronic smiled. "I'll talk about it later. Let's continue the tour first. We wouldn't want to wake him up." They continued down the hallway.

Finally, they stopped in front of the Backstage door. The door was only slightly open. There was slight… shuffling? Mike had the sudden urge to burst open the door if it weren't for Bonnie's voice interrupting him.

"This is the Backstage." The animatronic explained. "Whenever an animatronic malfunctions or is needed to be repaired, they are taken here. We also have spare parts and costumes here, just in case."

'If there were guards, or to you, 'endoskeletons'' Mike thought. He didn't bother to voice his thoughts, he didn't want to die tonight. The guard heard more shuffling and metal clinking inside, so he decided to ask. "W-Who's in there? I hear shuffling."

Bonnie answered. "It must be Freddy, cleaning and arranging the spare costumes in there. He doesn't like the place messy."

Pictures of being stuffed into a Freddy Fazbear suit immediately flashed through the guard's mind. He shook it off.

"We should go now Mike. Freddy's still busy." With that, Mike started to walk away, Mike following suit. They passed by the Dining Area, which Mike already saw every morning. They stopped in front of the Show Stage.

The Show Stage was lacking its iconic trio of performers, but then again, the three were roaming around at night. The stage, which was usually covered by a red curtain, was now rose up, showing the colorful backgrounds of the stage. The stage lights were turned off, of course, giving a sinister feeling, even more so if the three occupants were there.

"So this is the Show Stage. This is where we perform and wake up, obviously." Bonnie bluntly explained. Mike had goose bumps just looking at the stage. He was really feeling uncomfortable.

"Um, can we go now, Bonnie? I'm really getting a bit uncomfortable…" Mike awkwardly said. The lavender-clothed animatronic nodded, a bit questioningly. "Ok then."

They started to walk down the hallway. The next destination was quite the distance, so Mike decided to ask.

"So… what are the others like?" Mike asked curiously. The animatronic tilted his head mechanically and thought for a moment.

"Well," Bonnie started. "Freddy is the most… mature out of all of us. He is our leader, after all." The humanoid animatronic smiled and shook his head. "Whenever a fight is going on, he is always there to calm everyone down. No matter how drastic the situation, he is always calm and collected, and thinks carefully. He can always come up with a plan easily, too. He really is a great leader."

Mike was a bit amazed by this. He didn't expect the bear to have a personality Bonnie just described. But it would make sense, since the bear was the most cunning and hard to fend off. "What about Chica?"

Bonnie's expression changed almost immediately, going from peaceful to annoyed in a second. He scoffed and crossed his arms, closing his eyes in annoyance. Mike was baffled and at the same time amused by this.

"Oh, HER." He said, his right eye twitching, before unfolding his arms. "She is the most annoying animatronic in existence." The humanoid animatronic said as he huffed. Mike raised on of his eyebrows questioningly. "Why?" The guard asked curiously.

"Well, for starters, she 'jokes' about everyone and everything." He said as he stopped walking, Mike following suit. "Regardless of who or what degree of importance. She torments people with her 'jokes', which are actually insults. She even insults me, Freddy and Foxy." He twitched. "Especially Foxy."

Mike felt awkward now. "So… you don't like her?" The answer is obvious, and Mike understood. The animatronic chicken's personality was… sassy.

Bonnie let out another mechanical huff. "I hate her." He bluntly said, and began walking again. The guard followed him.

"And Foxy?" Mike continued. Bonnie's frown turned into a gentle smile.

"Oh, Foxy? He's very nice." The lavender-clothed animatronic said as they walked.

'Nice!? How the hell is HE nice!?' Mike thought angrily. He remembered the first time he saw the animatronic fox run down the hallway. The guard almost had a panic attack whenever he saw him!

"He's very sweet, very cheerful and childish. He's a little shy, clumsy and uncertain of himself, but you'll get used to it. He wasn't really shy before. It's probably because of the extreme isolation he experienced after the…" Mike swore that Bonnie held a fearful expression for a second before disappearing, the gentle smile was put on again. "Yeah, he's a loving and gentle guy. It's hard to believe he's a pirate." Mike nodded, although surprised at the fox's described personality.

They had finally arrived at their destination: A closed door with a 'KITCHEN' labeled across it. They could hear pots and pans rattling inside.

"This is the kitchen, where SHE usually hides." The bunny animatronic scoffed. "Playing with pots and pans like a child." Speaking of the kitchen, Mike had an interesting question in mind.

"Hey, I remembered that the kitchen camera was disabled. Why?" He turned to Bonnie, who looked at him in question. Then he gasped.

"Oh, I remember now!" The animatronic's face turned sheepish. "Surprisingly, this wasn't caused by Chica. It was Foxy who sort of… broke the camera." Mike was surprised as well. After all, the animatronic chicken seemed to be the most likely candidate.

"You see, when I was talking about Foxy being clumsy, I mean he's clumsy under pressure. Really clumsy." He scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "It's a silly story, but I don't want to embarrass him."

Mike nodded. The lavender-clothed animatronic turned to Mike. "Well, the tour's over." The guard looked up in confusion. "So… what now?" The animatronic grinned.

"Come with me." Both started to walk back to the stage. Bonnie approached his guitar on stage while Mike sat on the edge of the stage. The animatronic started tuning his guitar.

"So, do you know how to play a guitar?" Bonnie asked.

"Well, only a few notes here and there, but that's about it." Mike explained. He didn't really have time to play a guitar.

"Here," The animatronic rabbit grinned. "I'll give you a few more notes." He started strumming his red guitar, his mechanical fingers and hands moving so fast to cooperate with the tune that it was hard to believe that he was an animatronic. The tune was amazing, too! Mike watched and listened with awe. Bonnie was a professional! And he's an animatronic, for Christ's sake!

Unfortunately, the jam ended too soon. Mike bursted into loud applause and whistling. Bonnie smiled and bowed.

"That was amazing!" Mike gushed.

"Haven't played like that in a LONG time." Bonnie's smile suddenly turned into a smirk. "Wanna know how I did it?"

Mike looked up in surprise at what the animatronic said, but smirked too.

"Hell yeah."

**End of Chapter 4**

**A/N: ARRGH THAT TOOK SO LONG TO WRITE- Oh, hello guys! I'm back! From prison! :D Although I have to go back… Dammit… :(**

**Also, I'm really sorry for the long update! Prison and reality is being an ass. But at least this chapter is not as tiny as the others. That's a good thing, right?**

**Anyway, expect longer chapters from here onwards :)**

**See ya guys later! –Julz "My fingers are broken from typing, but it's fucking worth it."**


	6. Cooking Lessons with Chica

**Chapter 5: Cooking Lessons with Chica**

Mike went through the double doors again, but this time, he was smiling. He had a jam session with Bonnie and it was A LOT of fun. He learned tons of key notes and got to listen to Bonnie's guitar skills. Who knew he was learning all of this from a robot?

The guard went straight to his office and sat on his spinning chair. It was already 12:07, but Mike didn't need to worry much anymore. Mike only sat patiently and watched Bonnie move through the rooms, coming nearer and nearer towards his office. In no time, the animatronic was already beside the doorway.

"Hey Mike." Bonnie said, grinning. "Did you have fun last night?"

Mike grinned back. "Sure as hell I did. Learned a lot, too." The animatronic's grin suddenly faded, a frown replacing it.

"Well, Mike," Bonnie said solemnly. "We have to get going."

"W-What?" Mike stuttered, fear coming back. Were they going to stuff him in a suit!?

"Relax Mike," The bunny animatronic reassured him. "We're not going to hurt you." The frown came back. "You'll just have to meet _her_."

"Her? Chica?" Mike asked as he stood up. Bonnie nodded. "Yeah. I'll explain more along the way." They both went out of the office through the East Hallway.

As they went down the hallway, Mike spoke up. "So… each of you will spend time with me each night?" The guard asked.

Bonnie nodded. "Yes. Since you, um… 'passed out' when me and Chica simultaneously went in, we decided and agreed that we'll take it slowly. One by one." Mike nodded, feeling a bit embarrassed about the whole 'passing out' incident (Actually, he fainted. He doesn't want to admit it)

They had stopped in front of the Kitchen. From inside, they could hear pots and pans rattling. Bonnie gave out a mechanical huff and crossed his arms, unamused look on his face.

"She's playing with pots and pans in the kitchen again." He crossed his arms and turned to Mike with a softer look. "Bear with Chica's personality and antics, she can be a bit… mean and-"

A loud metallic crash was heard in the kitchen, as well as a loud 'Gosh Darnit!' Bonnie facepalmed, metallic sound coming from the contact. "-Stupid." He muttered. Mike winced a little at the crash.

The lavender-clothed animatronic sighed. "Let's go in." He said as he opened the door. Both of them went inside, Bonnie crouching down a bit as he did so.

The chicken animatronic was brushing dirt from her dress when she heard metal footsteps as well as another set of footsteps, this one more quiet than the other. She looked up to see Bonnie glaring her down. One of his mechanical bunny ears twitched.

"Hey!" Chica shouted indignantly. "What are ya doing here without permission!" The bunny animatronic narrowed his eyes at her.

"You do know that this kitchen doesn't belong to you, right?" He asked venomously. Chica grinned maliciously at him.

"Well," She started, still grinning. "That's like saying that the red guitar you always have doesn't belong to you." The male animatronic gave her a dirty look.

Chica ignored him. Instead, she looked at Mike with a surprised look on her face. Then she grinned. "Oh, it's my turn."

Bonnie sighed for what seemed to be the umpteenth time. "You forgot, didn't you?" He asked in a 'I-knew-it' tone. Chica huffed. "Hey, give this chicken a break! I forgot, okay!" She crossed her arms.

The male animatronic ignored her and turned to Mike. "I guess I'll leave you with her…" Bonnie said hesitantly as he glared at Chica once more. The chicken animatronic glared back.

"Hey, I can take care of it, BonBon." Chica bit back. Bonnie tensed.

"Do not call me BonBon!" He shouted at her angrily. They glared at each other for a while before Bonnie broke away from the showdown. He turned to Mike.

"I guess I'll see you later." He said slowly and left. Chica let out a 'pfft' and crossed her arms. "Dope." She muttered quietly.

'I can't help but think that I'm being babysitted.' Mike thought to himself.

"So, you've been in this kitchen before?" Chica's question brought the guard out of his thoughts.

Mike replied. "Well, no, not really." It was the truth. He didn't really have time to visit or go see the kitchen.

The chicken animatronic suddenly let out a robotic gasp, startling Mike. "Are. You. KIDDING ME!?" She exclaimed. Chica forcefully grabbed the guard's arm and looked at him straight in the eye.

Mike was starting to regret on what he had said.

"Dude," Chica started, staring the poor guard down. "The kitchen is the most important place in this gosh darn pizzeria. You know why?"

Mike shook his head, shuddering in fear. It was pathetic, but being stared down by a robo-human chicken who is twice your size and much larger than you sounds really intimidating.

Meanwhile, Chica was having real fun torturing Mike. She may look like she's serious, but in reality, she was laughing her butt off in her CPU.

"We make pizzas here. PIZZAS." The animatronic shook the poor guard's shoulder quite harshly. "They're the most important things EVER." She stopped shaking him and instead looked at him questioningly.

"Wait, have you tasted any of my pizzas before?" She asked.

"W-Well, no." Came the guard's shaky reply. Sure he was given free pizza sometimes, but he didn't really want the animatronic to know that.

The animatronic stared at him for a while before giving a surprisingly soft chuckle. "Hey you're acting like a wussy, y'know that? I'm not going to eat you or something." 'Did they just forgot about last week?' Mike thought. They might have forgotten about the attempts of stuffing him in a suit, but HE hadn't.

"Plus," Chica continued, voice snarky again. "You need help, little man! And food!" Mike raised an inquisitive eyebrow at the chicken animatronic, fear leaving him.

"I'm gonna teach ya how to bake Freddy Fazbear's signature pizza from the professional herself!" She pointed at, of course, herself.

The guard had to admit, the animatronic was a bit… narcissistic.

The chicken animatronic went to the kitchen table, Mike following her. "Wait here." Mike, of course, didn't believe that she would be the one cooking, so he was surprised to see Chica starting to pull out ingredients from the big-yet-tiny-compared-to-her fridge.

"Wait, you guys can COOK?" The guard couldn't help but ask.

"Of course we can! Well… at least I can." She said without turning to face him. "Gee Mike, you really have a knack for questioning the obvious, y'know that?" After picking out all of the ingredients, she approached Mike once again. She laid all of the ingredients on the table.

"Ask me anything while the professional bakes." The animatronic said to the guard as she started rolling the leftover dough from the fridge (she made the dough herself) Mike had a question in mind.

"How did you know that I was human, by the way?" Mike asked.

"Well, we realized that two nights ago. Fred, being the smart one, was the first one to figure it out." Chica answered while flattening the dough. "So the next night, a 'meeting' was held, and me and BonBon here agreed to approach ya. But I decided to have a little fun and try to scare you." She sheepishly grinned. "Well, you know what happened next." Mike glared at her. The animatronic put her hands up defensively.

"Hey, c'mon, I only wanted to have fun! Plus, you're not the only one who's angry. BonBon had been pretty angry too. I was glad that that Fred and Fox was only concerned." Her tone was still sheepish. Mike was angry, but he was inwardly chuckling at the nicknames the chicken animatronic gave her.

"Where were you guys anyway?" Mike asked, raising an eyebrow. "I haven't seen you guys in any of the cameras for hours!" He wanted to know, he was panicking when he hadn't seen any of them in the cameras at that time.

Chica winked at him. "As the Fox would say: 'Sorry matey, pirate's secret.'" Mike huffed and crossed his arms, a bit annoyed that the chicken animatronic wasn't giving him a direct answer.

The animatronic started to flip and spin the flattened dough to make it more circular, like how a professional pizza chef would. The guard was surprised that the dough hadn't stick to Chica's mechanical fingers. She then settled the dough down on the table. She grabbed the tomato sauce and poured the contents into a bowl. She grabbed some spices from the counter, poured some of it over the bowl and used a wooden ladle (which was tiny compared to her hands) and stirred to mix the contents.

"Where did you learn all of this, anyway?" Mike asked as he continued to stare at the cooking animatronic in awe. Chica only shrugged.

"Well, I observed some of the chef's cooking and I grew fascinated in cooking and baking. Eventually, I did learn to cook, much to the others' surprise, even BonBon. I mostly cook pizzas and deserts and I usually leave it for the kids or for the staff." She grinned then started snickering. "The chefs still don't know who made all of these stuff but I can tell that they're thankful."

Mike could only nod. Although she seemed to be… narcissistic at times, she still did stuff for people and expected nothing back. There's a nice side in everyone, after all.

The animatronic started to spread the tomato sauce on the pizza. She also put in a lot of cheese. She started putting on the toppings, and judging by the toppings of choice (ham and pineapple) Mike guessed she was making a Hawaiian pizza. After putting in the last of the toppings she slid the pizza in the oven and closed it. She wiped her mechanical fingers on her apron, which had the words 'LET'S EAT!' on it.

Mike just noticed that, although she was designed to be a girly maid, judging by the clothing, her personality doesn't seem so. Sure, she cooks, but her rude and tomboyish personality seemed to say so otherwise. Bonnie, on the other hand, was designed to be a cool guitarist, with the rolled up sleeves and all, but he seemed to be more… subdued and mature than Chica, ironically. Mike wondered where they got and developed their personalities.

"Ok Mike," Her voice brought him out of his thoughts. "It's my turn to ask questions." The animatronic turned around to face him, a questioning look on her face. She crossed her arms and looked at him squarely.

"What did BonBon tell you about me?" She asked, or more like demanded.

"W-Well," The guard stuttered a bit. "He mostly said negative things about you, like how you are selfish and you like to insult other people…" His voice trailed off. He didn't want to anger the animatronic, after all!

Instead of looking hurt, Chica only grinned and started snickering. "No surprise there. BonBon's just butthurt about all of the clever jokes I make." She sneered

Mike raised both of his eyebrows. "Do you really hate him THAT much?" He asked.

The chicken animatronic gave him a sarcastic look. "Oh gee, Mike, what made you think of THAT?" She said sarcastically. Her sarcastic smile faded. "He's stuck up, thinking he's the leader and all. Fred is." She threw her hands up in exasperation. "And he's ALWAYS on the Fox's side. The innocent and happy-go-lucky one." She scoffed. "Never met a pirate THAT sensitive." The animatronic grumbled some more.

Mike thought it was a good time to change the topic.

The guard looked at the kitchen camera, which was a bit broken. It had a bit of broken glass and a few cracks here and there, but it was still somehow functioning, at least the audio was.

"What happened to the kitchen camera, by the way. It looks a bit broken-" He was cut off by sudden loud, mechanical laughter coming from the chicken animatronic. She was currently slapping her metal knees (which resembled that of a chicken) while holding her none-existent stomach.

The guard was baffled… but at the same time, amused.

"HAHAHAHA- O-Oh… S-Sorry." She apologized as her laughter died down. "Well, did Bonnie ever tell you about the story?" The animatronic chicken looked like she was going to start a cackling fit again as she asked him. Thankfully, she held it back.

"Well, I did ask him about it, and he looked quite sheepish and guilty to answer." Chica rolled her eyes at that. Mike continued anyway. "But he did say that it was Foxy who apparently broke the camera." He explained.

The maid animatronic shook her head and let out a soft chuckle, surprising Mike again. "Well, at least I get to tell the story."

"About 3 years ago, I think, Foxy wasn't fond of going out of the little cove of his. He was a bit shy and miserable. So each of us tried to cheer him up and 'lure' him out of his cove." For a second, an angry and sad expression was on the animatronic's face. Just like Bonnie, the expression disappeared as fast as it came, a grin replacing it.

The animatronic chicken continued. "One night, I decided to invite him to the kitchen for a little bit of friendly bonding and teach him a bit of cooking, but things started to get silly." The guard could tell that she was trying her best to contain her guffaws, in which she failed miserably.

'I told him to get me the tomato sauce, and he did, but he slipped and…" Her guffaws turned into chuckles. "Let's just say that he caused A LOT of destruction. The kitchen camera was part of the disaster."

Mike couldn't help but break into a sincere smile. "Bonnie did say Foxy was clumsy under pressure." He mentioned.

Chica grinned. "That was why there was a lot of destruction. We never forgot about that incident. If you remind Fox about it, he would always get embarrassed!"

Her grin turned into a gentle smile. "But what I liked most is that… he smiled and laughed. We hadn't seen him smile like that since before…" Her smile turned into a frown.

DING!

"Oh, pizza's ready!" She exclaimed, her usual grin coming back. She grabbed a pair of oven gloves and lifted the pizza carefully and with ease. The smell wafted through the kitchen and Mike felt his mouth water a bit from the delicious smell.

Chca placed the pizza on a large plate and put it on the table. "Bon appetite!" She said, but the guard only stared at the pizza, feeling his stomach grumble. The animatronic took note of this.

"Well, ya gotta stare at it or ya gonna eat it?" She asked. Mike woke up from his trance and looked at her incredulously. "Can I?"

"Of course you can, ya dope! I made this for you!" The chicken animatronic exclaimed. She pushed the pizza towards him. "Come on, try it!" She insisted.

Mike didn't hesitate take a piece now that the chef had approved. He took a slice, tasted it, and…

It. Was. HEAVENLY.

The guard started to chomp down on the pizza until his fingers were the only ones left. He even started to lick his fingers.

"So, is it good?" She asked, her grin getting broader.

"Hell yeah it is!" He exclaimed enthusiastically as he swallowed. The animatronic's grin got bigger, if that was possible. "Can I have another slice?"

"Help yourself, little man." She replied. Mike scoffed a little at the nickname, but he grabbed a slice anyway. When he was about to started eating but he suddenly stopped and stared at the animatronic.

"How about you, Chica?" He stared at her. "Why don't you grab a slice?" The chicken animatronic gave him a questioning look.

"Duh, I'm an animatronic." She deadpanned.

Mike almost facepalmed. 'Of course! I'm a dumbass…' He thought annoyed at himself for asking such a stupid question. "Sorry…"

The animatronic chuckled. "Well, that WAS stupid of you…" The guard glared at her playfully before chuckling too.

"Hey Mike."

"Yeah?"

"I forgive you."

"For what?"

"For hitting me with that chair."

"Oh, yeah… sorry about that… I was scared…"

"Hey, it's fine. It didn't hurt me anyway. Plus, you're a wussy, that I understand."

"Hey…!"

They talked and laughed and ate (specifically Mike) as they waited for 6am. The night was still young, after all.

**End of Chapter 5**

**A/N: AND DONE! :)**

**Hey guys, I'm back and with a longer chapter than the others by far. I hope this is enough for you guys who have waited all week for the next chapter. Really sorry for the long absence.**

**Also, I don't really know how to cook a pizza, so pardon me if I miscalculated or skipped any steps. **

**There was a person I the reviews who asked how the animatronics knew that Mike was a human. I'm afraid you have to wait patiently for the answer, good sir/madam/agender ;)**

**Anyway, guys, I'll see ya in the next chapter, bye bye! -Julz "Wow, 27 faves and 41 follows?! You guys are AWESOME! :D"**


	7. Ahoy Maties!

**Chapter 6: Ahoy Mateys!**

"Heya Mikey!" Chica greeted the guard as soon as she entered through her usual path, the east doorway. "Can I call you that?" She asked.

Mike huffed and glared at the chicken animatronic. "No." He deadpanned. Chica only grinned at this.

"Okay, _Mikey_." She retorted. "I'm gonna call ya Mikey for as long as I want." The animatronic grinned even more, if that was possible, when Mike scowled at her. However, she could tell that it was half-hearted.

"Anyway, enough of this flirting." She said nonchalantly as she strolled over to where the guard sat. "As much as I would like to tease and joke about your name, we gotta get moving."

Mike nodded and stood up from his seat. He understood now that Bonnie had explained it to him. However, he still wondered who he was going to 'hang out' with.

He approached the female animatronic with a smile. "Let's go."

They both went out of the room through the west door, through the same path he and Bonnie did on the day they hung out. After walking a short distance they stopped in front of a familiar purple-curtained stage.

"Well, here we are." Chica spoke up in a welcoming manner. "Oh, and before you ask the obvious, yeah, you're gonna meet the Fox."

The guard's nervousness and fear came back, the fear that he felt when he was in the office trying to protect himself from Foxy. He didn't notice it, but he was white in fear.

Chica noticed this and looked at him in confusion and bemusement. "Hey, you okay there, Mikey?" The female animatronic asked, surprisingly worried. "You look like you've seen a ghost or something."

Mike shakily nodded. "Y-Yeah, it's just that… I've seen him in the cameras before. He's huge… and intimidating." He stuttered. There was some truth to it.

Chica grinned at him, worry fading away. "Yeah, that may be true," She agreed. "But the Fox won't do anything to ya, much less hurt ya. He's too sensitive to do THAT." She said jokingly, but then she turned serious.

"But seriously, even though it's fun scaring the heck out of you, we all won't hurt ya. Especially big guy there." Chica reassured him.

Mike looked relieved. He was, slowly but surely, trusting the animatronics. "Oh, thanks Chica- Wait, what did you just call him…!?"

Suddenly, the purple curtains shifted and opened, a shadow looming over them. Mike started sweating bullets.

"Oh, heya big guy! We were just talking 'bout ya!" The chicken animatronic greeted him nonchalantly as she approached Foxy. "Got enough sleep?"

The fox animatronic, whom Chica could NOT even reach his shoulder, nodded slowly. He wore torn pirates clothes, exposing the endoskeleton, especially around the chest and feet, his tail swishing behind him. His hookless hand was slowly rubbing his eye, as if he had just woken up from literal sleep. He turned to Chica, slowly blinking his glowing eyes.

"Wha' is it, lass?" He asked, almost slurring. Chica just patted his metallic back as she shook her head.

"It's your turn, sleep sack."

This seemed to 'wake up' Foxy, as his drooped eyelids flew open in surprise.

"Blas', I forgot!" He exclaimed in a heavy pirate accent and immediately turned to Chica apologetically. "I be sorry Chica, I forgot." He apologized, sadness and regret filling his voice.

The chicken animatronic grinned up at him. "S'okay Fox, I forgot when it was my turn, too." She replied sincerely. She gestured at the nervous guard. Foxy beamed as he saw Mike.

"Ahoy, Mike!" He greeted him cheerfully and waved at him with a slightly shy smile. Mike nervously waved back. "H-Hi." Unlike the fox animatronic, he wasn't really shy. He was scared.

Chica noticed the nervousness in the guard's voice and decided to approach him. "Hey Mike, don't be so nervous. He's an extremely gentle guy, trust me." The female animatronic reassured him. "Sure, he's twice my height and a lot bigger than you, but he's so gentle and cheery that you'll forget that he's a pirate!" Mike chuckled a little at the chicken animatronic's joke, a bit relieved now that even the ever sarcastic chicken reassured him. "Thanks Chica." He thanked her sincerely.

Both started to approach the fox animatronic, who wasn't actually listening to their conversation. Instead, he was quietly musing to himself and fiddling with his hook until he heard the two approaching him.

Chica patted Foxy on the back, since she literally can't reach the pirate's shoulder. "'Guess I'll leave the little man to ya."

She started walking away, passing Mike in the process. The female animatronic winked and waved at him nonchalantly. "See ya guys later." After a short while, she was gone.

After she left, they both looked at each other, both feeling awkward and shy (at least Foxy was) Mike decided to break the silence first.

"Well, um…" The guard awkwardly started. "Nice to meet you, erm… Foxy." He was about to extend his hand for a handshake, but was instead enveloped by two metallic arms in a literally hard hug. The poor guard was lifted off a good distance from the ground and was being squeezed to death by a robo-human fox.

"Nice to meet ya too, lad!" Foxy exclaimed with joy, his bushy mechanical tail waving behind him. He was squeezing even harder than before, as Mike was struggling to breathe. However, he was glad that he wasn't being pressed into the exposed endoskeleton chest.

"F-Foxy…" The poor guard managed to blurtout. "Y-You're choking me…" Foxy dropped him in surprise, Mike landing on his butt with a 'thump!'. Mike was coughing a little as he looked up at the animatronic. The fox animatronic looked pretty guilty as he gazed at the guard.

"I-I be sorry, Mike." The animatronic apologized, like how he did to Chica. He really was 'sensitive' when it came to hurting people or seeing people hurt.

"Hey, it's okay Foxy. Don't be sorry." The guard reassured him as he stood up, brushing off dust from his pants. "I know you are excited. Many people do that when they're happy or overjoyed."

The fox animatronic beamed at this, now much happier and relieved. "T-Thank ye, lad." Mike nodded and stared at the purple curtains behind Foxy. The pirate noticed this and suddenly exclaimed. "'Ol Foxy didnae give ya a tour at the cove!" He exclaimed excitedly, happy at the fact that he was going to entertain someone since he was out of order for who-knows-how-long.

"Come wi' me, lad!" He grasped the guard's arm as gently as he could (although it still hurts for Mike) and dragged him towards the curtain, much to Mike's surprise.

The guard could not see anything but Foxy's glowing yellow eyes once they were inside. The crushing metallic pressure on his hand was gone and he felt himself massaging his hands. The lights turned on and Mike looked up to observe the surroundings.

The stage was prominently old. The walls were faded , with scratches and a huge set of tally marks all over the place. The floors were also littered with scratch marks. The paint were blurred and slightly peeled off. The windows were also barricaded with plywood. A treasure chest was also on a corner, in which Foxy appeared to be rummaging from.

The fox managed to pull out a bandana. It was just a normal red bandana, with skull patterns. He once again approached Mike and gingerly gave it to the guard.

"Pu' it on." Foxy said childishly, beaming. Mike obliged, took off his security hat and tied the bandana to his head like how a first mate in a pirate crew would. It was a bit small for him, but it somehow fit, nonetheless. The animatronic cheered.

"Aye, ye be me first mate!" Foxy cheered happily. He turned around and ran to the treasure chest rummaging through it again. The fox pulled out a much longer than the one he gave to Mike. He also whipped out a plastic cutlass and pointed it upwards. "And I be the cap'n!" The fox pirate bursted into a sea shanty.

_Do what you want, 'cause a pirate is free,_  
><em>YOU ARE A PIRATE!<em>  
><em>Yar har, fiddle di dee,<em>  
><em>Being a pirate is alright to be,<em>  
><em>Do what you want 'cause a pirate is free,<em>  
><em>You are a pirate!<em>

_You are a pirate!_

_We've got us a map,_  
><em>To lead us to a hidden box,<em>  
><em>That's all locked up with locks! <em>  
><em>And buried deep away!<em>

_We'll dig up the box,_  
><em>We know it's full of precious booty!<em>  
><em>Burst open the locks!<em>  
><em>And then we'll say hooray!<em>

_Yar, har, fiddle di dee._  
><em>If you love to sail the sea,<em>  
><em>You are a pirate!<em>

_Weigh anchooor!_

_Yar har, fiddle di dee,_  
><em>Being a pirate is alright with me!<em>  
><em>Do what you want ''cause a pirate is free,<em>  
><em>You are a pirate!<em>  
><em>Arr yarr, ahoy and avast,<em>  
><em>dinky-dink-dink-a-dinkadefast!<em>  
><em>Hang the black flag<em>  
><em>At the end of the mast!<em>  
><em>You are a pirate!<em>

_Hahahahaha!_

_We're sailing away,_  
><em>Adventure awaits on every shore!<em>  
><em>We set sail and explore (ya-har!)<em>  
><em>And run and jump all day <em>  
><em>We float on our boat <em>  
><em>Until its time to drop the anchor,<em>  
><em>Then hang up our coats <em>  
><em>Until we sail again!<em>

_Yar, har, fiddle di dee._  
><em>If you love to sail the sea,<em>  
><em>You are a pirate!<em>

_Laaaand ho!_

_Yar har, fiddle di dee,_  
><em>Being a pirate is alright with me!<em>  
><em>Do what you want 'cause a pirate is free,<em>  
><em>You are a pirate!<em>

_Yar har, wind at your back, lads,_  
><em>Wherever you go!<em>

_Blue sky above and blue ocean below,_  
><em>You are a pirate!<em>

_Hahahahahaha!_  
><em>You're a pirate!<em>

Mike laughed and cheered at the pirates antics. The pirate's voice was gruff, certainly expected from a robot who is designed like one, but somehow also cheery and childish. Also, despite being out of order, Mike assumed was a very long time, the animatronic's voice was still amazing, although a bit glitchy. Of course he would have to expect that from an animatronic who was made to sing like the rest…

Suddenly, he was being pulled by a metallic hand, almost flying when he was dragged across the stage. He felt a bit dizzy as he was gingerly put down.

"Sing wi' me, lad!" He heard the animatronic shout merrily. Although Mike didn't know the lyrics of the song, he decided to play along and sing the shanty with him. Soon, he was fully absorbed into the song and sang even louder and more confidence, although he wasn't a great singer.

Meanwhile, Bonnie was walking around the West Hall when he suddenly heard noises behind the purple curtains, more specifically, singing. One voice was from someone whose voice was very familiar and amazing, and the other was someone whom he just met last week, and was a bit less amazing than the first. The bunny animatronic couldn't help but chuckle under his breath(?) and continued walking.

Back to the two, both of them finished singing. Foxy was narrating one of his 'adventures' with his 'first mate', Mike.

"'Ol Cap'n Foxy and his trusty first mate, Mike, went abroad the ship, the Red Fox, and sailed into the Seven Seas." The fox animatronic narrated. Mike couldn't help but listen intently like a seven year old. As Foxy narrated, Mike felt like he was being pulled back into his childhood.

Well, until he was literally pulled out from his childhood nostalgia by Foxy. The latter threw another plastic cutlass at his 'first mate'. Mike was confused at first, but then grinned when he saw the adventurous smile the fox animatronic wore.

"Get ready, lad, we're off to fight Blackbeard!" Foxy exclaimed, raising his 'sword' upwards once again. Mike grinned even more, raising his plastic cutlass too.

"Well, let's go Cap'n!"

The rest of the night was spent finding treasure and fighting Blackbeard and his evil minions.

**End of Chapter 6**

**A/N: Whew! Finally done! :)**

**Hey guys, I'm back! Who missed me? I know some of you didn't. Anyway, sorry for the really long absence, I mean, two weeks? Yeah, I've been dead for a long time :/ But at least I got resurrected.**

**I know that this chapter's short, but I lost some of my motivation while making this one. But don't worry, I won't cancel or abandon this story. I'm a nice person like that.**

**Another thing that I have to talk about is the three's personalities (Chica, Bonnie and Foxy) I know you guys aren't used to seeing practically them switching their personalities, it's just that, that's how I portray them. I know you usually see Chica being the shy one and Foxy and/or Bonnie the joker or tough ones, but you're not me :) That's just how I portray them: Chica being the sassy one, Bonnie being the responsible one, and Foxy being the shy but unconsciously strong one. I know, that's not the norm, but their personalities are blank, so I get to do what I want.**

**Also, another note to you reviewers, don't constantly tell 'PLS UPDATE, PLSSSSSSSS!1!1!' or any review that urges me to quicken the update. Though it gives me some motivation from those comments, I also get stressed and I feel like I'm under pressure and the chapter ends up getting rushed. Just give me time, 'kay?**

**Alright, now that that's out of my chest, thank you guys for all the faves, follows, and reviews. Gives me energy to write (well, except for the 'PLS UPDATE!' review)**

**Edit: I just changed the song from 'Yo Ho A Pirate's Life for Me' to 'You are a Pirate'. I felt that A pirate's Life for Me was too graphic and just didn't fit like a children's song, so I replaced it with You are a Pirate. And no, I didn't think it was too graphic (because I didn't read much of it, silly me) and I'm thankful that ChimpmunkFanantic pointed it for me. Thanks! :)**

**See ya good folks later! –Julz "Just give me some time, folks. I'll update this. I'm looking at you, John Michael384 ." **


	8. Meeting with the Leader

**Chapter 7: Meeting with the Leader**

"So, I'm guessing only Freddy is left, huh?"

"Aye, he's the last on to meet ya."

Mike could only nod, absentmindedly following the pirate as he was led toward7s where the bear animatronic was. He wasn't as nervous or fearful as he was the last three days of spending time with each of the animatronics. He had learned from each of the animatronic that Freddy was the most mature and collected out of all of them.

The guard also learned from Chica two nights before that the 'oldest' was Freddy and the 'youngest' was, surprise of surprises, Foxy. Although she didn't say if she is 'older' or 'younger' than Bonnie, the guard could guess who's the 'younger' of the two (Chica) From what the guard could assume, 'younger' and 'older' meant who was created first.

"We're here, lad!" The pirate's voice brought Mike out of his thoughts. He was too deep into his musings that he forgot that they were actually going somewhere. He looked up to see that he was in the dining area. The guard was a bit confused with the choice of location but he was glad that Freddy didn't choose the backstage. The guard didn't want to know what was behind that room.

Mike looked around more and spotted Freddy, whose back was turned, arranging the party hats and chairs the day employees forgot to arrange. Foxy seemed to spot the bear animatronic, as the fox beamed. "Freddy, we be here!" He called and waved at him happily.

Freddy apparently heard it as he immediately turned around. When he faced Foxy and Mike, he immediately let out a smile similar to that of an affectionate father to his children.

"Foxy! Michael!" He greeted merrily and started to approach the two. "You're here!"

The bear animatronic hugged Foxy, who returned the kind gesture. Although not there, Mike could tell that Freddy was taller than Bonnie and Chica, but the bear could only reach the pirate's shoulder. Still, they were all giants compared to him.

Freddy hugged the guard next, squeezing him gently, unlike Foxy who nearly crushed his insides. Mike could hear clicks and clanks whirring inside Freddy before he was released. At least Freddy had restraint in him.

"So," The main mascot of the restaurant started. "This is the fellow." He grinned, patting Mike on the back. The guard almost fell over from the gesture, but Freddy ignored it. Foxy nodded enthusiastically in agreement.

The pirate turned to Freddy and smiled at him. "Well, I guess I'll leave tha lubba' to ye, Cap'n!" It was the main singer's turn to nod. Foxy started walking away.

"I'll see ye later, lad!" He called, and soon he was gone.

The bear animatronic turned to the guard. "Well, it's not polite to leave you standing. Come." He beckoned the guard to follow, in which he did, and led him to one of the dining tables. Mike sat on one of the dining room chairs while Freddy sat on a much bigger chair (which was prolly made by the animatronic himself) so that it could hold the animatronic's massive weight and size. As they got comfortable in their chairs, Freddy started to speak.

"So, have the others been giving you trouble?" Freddy asked.

Mike shook his head. "Well, no, not really. Well, Chica does joke and purposely scare me sometimes, Bonnie seems to be okay and Foxy squeezed me real hard one time…" The guard trailed off when he saw the broad smile on the animatronic's face.

"Well, that's just the way they show their appreciation of you," He told the guard. "After all, it's been a long time since we directly interacted with any customers and children. Especially Foxy." He smiled gently. "We were all excited."

Mike could only nod. He wasn't really scared of the animatronics anymore. After Bonnie's guitar lessons, Chica's cooking and his and Foxy's 'adventures', it may sound crazy, but they were not scary anymore. Well, their size might be, but they seemed to be nice in their own way.

"I understand." Mike said, also smiling.

"I'm pretty sure the others have told you why each one of us spends time with you each night." The bear animatronic said.

The guard sheepishly rubbed the back of his head with an embarrassed smile. "Yeah, with the… passing out accident."

Freddy just chuckled. "Don't be embarrassed, Michael. I'm sure that you were surprised and scared. Chica can be a bit playful sometimes, you know. But she wouldn't mean it." He reasoned. "She does 'mean' pranks sometimes, but she's just doing it for fun."

Mike nodded, convinced. Bonnie viewed her actions as 'idiotic' and 'stupid', but Freddy just viewed it as playful. The latter was right. The leader of the trio was a lot more calm and collected than Bonnie, for sure.

"Speaking of Chica's antics, what did the others do with you from the past few nights?" The animatronic asked curiously.

"Well," The guard started. "Bonnie gave me a tour around the restaurant and taught me some guitar notes. I'm impressed that he could pluck strings so fast and elegantly considering that he's a robot."

Freddy chuckled once again. "Bonnie's been around for many years, and what he does in the band is play guitar during and after performances. He had gotten quite good with playing guitar, even without the programming. We were all impressed by this."

Mike nodded once again and continued. "Chica taught me how to cook pizza… Well, one kind. And I managed to eat the pizza she cooked." The guard's mouth started to water. "The robot cooks better than the chef."

The bear animatronic smiled. "Like Bonnie, she practiced. I think her fascination and passion of cooking came from the chefs. She observed them by the day and then she would go to the kitchen at night. Every night." Freddy explained. "But I'm very happy for her hobby. She isn't exactly the most lady like animatronic I have seen."

The guard grinned. "I have heard."

"And Foxy?" This time, it was the animatronic's turn to grin.

"Well, it was tiring, but fun." Mike's grin was reduced to a smile. "He's much more childish than I thought. "

The bear animatronic nodded. "He had been like that since the day we met him. I think it's because he was made to interact more with the children than the rest of us did."

Freddy gently leaned back in his cheer, joy radiating from him. "It's not a burden, though. Whenever we're sad, he manages to cheer us up like how he did with the children. And he had been like that since the day we first met him."

"Well, Chica wasn't lying." Mike concluded, still smiling. "The pirate really is a gentle giant."

All of a sudden, the bear animatronic seemed to turn serious as he straightened himself. "Mike." He spoke seriously.

"Mike," He started. "Can I ask you a question? A serious question."

The guard gulped as he felt a bit nervous. "Of course, Freddy."

"Do you trust us?"

Mike thought for a bit. "Yes." He replied sternly. He was sure of it. They spent each of their time with him so that he could learn that they were not dangerous. That they can be trusted. That they just wanted to be _friends._

Friends.

That's something he didn't have.

The guard's eyes focused on the iconic singer as the latter let out what could be a sigh of relief. Then, he grinned joyfully. "Thank you for trusting us, Michael." He said truthfully, beaming with happiness. Mike raised an eyebrow.

"What made you think that I didn't trust you guys?" He asked. "If I didn't trust you guys, then I wouldn't be here hanging out with you."

Freddy hummed as he nodded. "You have a point there. But still, I'm happy. We're happy." He said sincerely. "You have no idea how long since we interacted with any customers, except for the mechanic and sometimes the manager."

Mike nodded once, looking around. He suspected that the others were at their 'stations' doing whatever they usually did every night. He averted his gaze back to Freddy, slowly smiling.

"You know, Freddy, it's my turn to ask. And I have a lot of questions."

Freddy smiled back

**End of Chapter 7**

**A/N: OH MY GOD THIS CHAPTER SUCKED-**

**Oh, hello. Welcome back to the 7****th**** chappie of this fanfic of mine. As you may know, this sucked ass and is long overdue.**

**But don't worry, things will get interesting in later chapters. I'm just telling ya this as a warning.**

**Reviews, faves and follows are nutritious for me and my lack of motivation. Flames will just burn me**

**Goodby for now! -Julz "Lame title is lame."**


	9. Friends

**Chapter 8: Friends**

Mike was in the kitchen or 'Chica's Kitchen', just watching the female animatronic cook. He was sitting on a table, eyes observing Chica. She was currently making a pepperoni pizza. She dumped a lot of cheese on it, tons of pepperoni, and slid it inside the oven. After wiping her robotic hands on her already dirty apron, she turned to Mike.

"So, what did good 'ole Fred tell ya yesterday, huh?" She asked casually, leaning on the table a bit. Mike shrugged.

"He asked me a few questions." The guard simply answered.

"A few questions, huh?" The animatronic asked suspiciously. "What did he tell you about me?"

Mike shrugged once again. "Well," he replied. "He just talked about your cooking talents and the fact that it's the only ladylike trait you have." Hey, the last part wasn't a complete lie!

"Pfft, whateva'" She crossed her arms nonchalantly. "Freddo always wanted me to act 'ladylike' all the time. But eventually he let it go and left my personality be." She added. "I'm kinda glad he did."

The guard suddenly broke into a smirk. "Oh, and I know for a fact that you're younger than Bonnie." Chica threw a playful scowl at him until they heard a familiar 'ding!'

"Pizza's ready!" Chica exclaimed, and immediately her pair of mitts before retrieving the pizza. The smell drifted throughout the kitchen and, of course, Mike was drooling.

"Hey, you ain't getting' some 'till we reac h the dining table." The chicken animatronic piped up, grinning. She laughed when Mike pouted.

"Come on, little man. Let's go!" Pizza in her right hand, Chica went out of the room, the guard following suit.

When they arrived at the dining area, they found the other three seated on a table. Each of them were doing their own thing. Freddy was arranging the party hats exactly in line (the animatronic seriously has OCD) Foxy was sharpening his hook (kinda scary) and Bonnie was busy tuning the strings of his guitar. They immediately looked up when they heard familiar footsteps.

"Mike! Chica!" The pirate happily like a child would when he saw Santa, and ran quickly up to hug both of them.

Chica and Mike both laughed as they were enveloped by large, metallic arms. The female animatronic patted him on the back, grinning. "Let go, Fox, you're crushing me, Mike and the pizza." The pirate immediately let go, giving an apologetic look to both of them. The bunny and the bear animatronic was smiling at the warm exchange.

"Hey, let's not leave those guys hangin'! Come on!" Chica piped up, and both of them went to the table.

As soon as they were in front of the table, Freddy immediately greeted them. Bonnie stopped tuning his guitar and instead put it down. He turned to them and smiled.

"Hey Mike… _Chica._" He said the last part rather begrudgingly.

"_Bonnie_." The chicken animatronic sneered back. Lightning seemed to strike between them as they glared at each other. Mike leaned to Freddy.

"They sure hate each other." He whispered. The humanoid animatronic chuckled knowingly and crossed while the fox just stared.

"They're siblings, you know. Siblings fight a lot. In fact, we are all siblings. You could say that I'm the 'older brother'." He explained.

'Or a father.' Mike thought.

Freddy decided to intervene between the glaring showdown. "Ok, break it up, you two." He said as he pushed the two away from each other. Both huffed, not looking at each other. The bear animatronic couldn't help but sigh, putting his hands on his hips.

"Chica, don't you have a pizza to serve?" He asked gently.

"Oh, right!" The chicken animatronic realized, just remembering it right now. She laid the still-hot pizza on the table and opened it. The small once again wafted through the dining room Mike immediately took a smaller seat, hungry, causing the others to chuckle. The rest also took a seat.

"Well, wha' are ya waiting for, lad? Go on and eat!" The pirate urged, and that's what all it took for Mike to immediately grab a slice and scoff it in his mouth. The flavor of cheese and juicy pepperoni immediately bursted in his mouth. Once he finished his first slice, he immediately grabbed another one.

The guard felt a bit awkward and slowed his chewing a bit when he looked up at the animatronics. The others didn't seem to mind, although Foxy looked a bit… uncertain.

"M-Mike, lad…?" The fox animatronic spoke up uncertainly. "Ye know ye are our friend, righ'?" Now everyone was staring at him, also looking uncertainly. Except for Freddy, who just nodded at the guard.

Mike stuttered a bit. "Y-Yeah."

"B-Bu'… are _we_ your friends?"

The guard was silent for a moment. The silence was overwhelming.

Then Chica proceeded to break the silence by standing up, slamming her metallic hands on the table and exclaimed. "Yeah, we're your friends, right!?" Even Bonnie was staring at him with determined eyes, looking for an answer.

Mike thought for a while and looked back at what happened last night.

"_Thank you for trusting us, Michael." He said truthfully, beaming with happiness. Mike raised an eyebrow._

"_What made you think that I didn't trust you guys?" He asked. "If I didn't trust you guys, then I wouldn't be here hanging out with you."_

_Freddy hummed as he nodded. "You have a point there. But still, I'm happy. We're happy." He said sincerely. "You have no idea how long since we interacted with any customers, except for the mechanic and sometimes the manager."_

"Of course I'm your friend." Mike replied firmly. The look on his face was determined and sincere it made the others (except Freddy) sigh with relief and happiness. Foxy immediately ran over and squeezed the guard, grinning and radiating with happiness.

"Thank ye, lad! Thank ye for being our friend!" He exclaimed happily squeezing Mike almost to suffocation. But the guard didn't mind. Not at all.

The chicken animatronic piped up, grinning. "Hey, we're here too! Don't leave us hanging!" She walked up to them also joined the hug.

"Hey, BonBon, Fred! Don't be so lonely!" Bonnie and Freddy couldn't help but grin and nod at what Chica said and ran to join the group hug.

Although he was being hugged by a bunch of metal robo-human animals, he still felt warmth inside. He wasn't really a social person so he didn't have any friends.

"You know, this is getting really cheesy." Mike sarcastically spoke up as he laughed. They broke away from the hug, all grinning and smiling.

They were a weird bunch, but now he won't have to be alone.

**End of Chapter 8**

**A/N: I heard you like fluff, so I give you fluff.**

**Hey, I'm back, and a quick update too. No biggie though since this is a short chapter. In fact, the next few chapters are short too. Sorry 'bout that.**

**Well, there's nothing else to say other than the drama and gore will ramp up a bit in the next chapters. Just a little warning for you guys in case you probably thought this was a happy, fluffy fic when there's a reason it is rated T ;)**

**Well, there's nothing else to say. Peace! -Julz "[insert random quote here]"**


	10. Research (Part 1)

**Chapter 9: Research (Part 1)**

Mike thanked the old lady as he gave her her change. He sighed as he leaned back in his chair, resting. It was already closing time at the department store he was working in during weekends.

The now cashier closed his eyes. 'To be quite honest, I already miss them.' He thought to himself while smiling slightly. 'I wonder if they miss me.' He sounded like a teenage girl missing her long distance boyfriend, but whatever.

"Hey, Mike, whatcha smiling about?" His coworker, Ralph, suddenly piped up behind him, distracting Mike from his thoughts. "Ya thinking about a girl ya love or something?" Ralph's personality and manner of talking seriously reminded Mike of the chicken animatronic.

"Uh, n-no." He answered unsteadily. His coworker just raised an eyebrow.

"Ok then. But I know that you're thinking about a girlfriend." Mike glared a bit at him. Ralph just let out an obnoxious laugh. Yup. He seriously reminded him of Chica.

"Oh, by the way," His coworker continued. "I rarely see ya here. Part time job or somethin'?"

Although it was fun to talk to his (robot) friends (sounds a bit crazy) it was also comforting to talk to a fellow human once in a while.

"Yeah, sort of." Mike replied.

Ralph continued to ask. "So, where's the other job?"

"Freddy Fazbear's Pizza. Security guard." The cashier replied simply.

His co-worker's eyes widened dramatically. "Freddy Fazbear's Pizza?" He whispered fearfully like he had just experienced seeing a ghost. "I've heard that it's 'Hell on Earth'! Is it true?"

Mike felt a bit offended and angry. "Hey, it's not that bad!"

Ralph retaliated. "Well, have you ever heard of the 'Bite of '87'?"

"The Bite of '87?" The cashier was a bit taken aback. "Well, I have heard of it, but never really looked into it…" He trailed off.

"Dude, you haven't!?" Ralph asked/exclaimed. "It was said that in 1987, one of the creepy ass robots-" "Animatronics." Mike butted in. Ralph just rolled his eyes and continued. "One of the _animatronics _bit off the forehead of a man! The frontal lobe to be exact."

The cashier's eyes widened. 'What!?' He thought frantically. 'One of the animatronics did it? But why…? I mean, it's not really surprising because of the stuffing, but…'

Ralph saw the frantic look on his co-worker's face and decided to continue. "And then there's the Five Missing Children…"

Mike's eyes widened even more, if that was possible. "What?" He asked, staring at his co-worker.

Ralph just nodded. "Even before the Bite of '87, from I've heard, there were five children that were said to be at first missing. But it was later found out that they were killed inside the restaurant and probably stuffed into the animatronic suits." He explained. "The blood and mucus were cleaned out, but it is said that the animatronics were possessed by the souls of the five dead children."

The cashier narrowed his eyes. "Are you telling me this just to scare me?" His co-worker held his hands up in defense.

"Dude, trust me, this is all true." He reassured him. "Well, except maybe the five children possessing the animatronics but you get the point."

He put his hands down as Mike glared at him. "Trust me dude, just do the research." With that, Ralph stood up and stretched his stiff body.

"Looks like it's time to go home." He picked up his things and bid goodbye before going out of the store. "See ya later, dude."

Mike was the only one left in the store, leaving him with his thoughts. The franchise and the animatronics have a long and he was curious. REALLY curious.

A little research won't hurt right?

But one thing's for sure: the answers are not going to be pleasant.

**End of Chapter 9**

**A/N: MIKE NOOOOOO-**

**Yay, I'm back! :D Yeah, I know that this chapter's really REALLY short, but you have to admit, this is taking a HUGE leap in our plot. And I'm pretty sure you've seen this coming.**

**Fluff is going on vacation for a while, so for his replacement, we'll have drama! Ain't that great? Mike's gonna get the shock of his life (or maybe not) in the next chapter. Oh, and get ready to cry your heart out guys, 'cuz Mike is going to break some animatronics' (robot) hearts. After the next chapter. Poor guys, they've been through a lot :( **

**Anyway, sorry for my rambling. Reviews, faves and follows is good. Flames are bad. We don't want bad.**

'**Till the next chappie! –Julz "Ignorance is bliss, Mike. Ignorance is bliss."**


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